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May 2012: “Observe the natural cycles within your relationship”

It’s easy to see all of the flaws and areas for improvement in our relationships. It’s also easy to allow ourselves, in seeing these things, to get stuck in a limited belief that things will always be this way. With this thought, our relationships either stagnate or decline, we give up hope for a different future, and begin making ‘all or nothing’ statements.

Let’s step outside the domain of relationships for a moment and observe nature and the cycle of the seasons. Each season contains certain observable phenomena - germination, blossoming, harvesting, decay, composting, etc. Are the cycles that exist within our relationships that much different? If we stand back and simply observe with acceptance the peaks and valleys and all of the spaces in between, might we find true peace? It’s a practice worth trying out.

This month, when you observe yourself in a rut in a particular relationship that feels hopeless, step outside this belief for a moment and take a long view. What cycle are you in and what is its purpose? How is it serving your own personal growth and the growth of your relationship? If there appears to be no movement happening, look again. What movement might be happening under the surface? What new possibilities emerge as you expand the way you see your relationship?